Blog-Off Battle: Calvin Shub (Part 1: Government Constructive)
Because Slagging Other People Off Is Better Through Rhyme

Something about this silence disturbs me. To the bottom-left of this page, under ‘Link Anything’, you will find that I host links to blogs that are maintained by ‘friends’. These ‘friends’ of mine are benefitting from those links because I have the most wonderful readers, even though you readers number less than – I don’t know – a thousand? Ok, seven – but that’s a very rough estimate.

How do these blogger ‘friends’ benefit when they clearly have much higher viewerships, you ask? Don’t they get readers numbering in the hundreds? Or maybe thousands, if there’s a new sex tape around? Am I delusional? Well, yeah – but I already knew that (duh!). We’re not talking about popularity. These no-good turkeys benefit because I leave them alone. Well, I’m not having that anymore. Nobody puts Ro-Dawg in the corner. I’m not particularly fond of keeping the peace, if you get my drift.

There’s a blogger out there calling himself Calvin Shub. He was nominated in the recent Globe Tatt Awards for the Tech Junkie category. Well, guess what? He lost. L-O-S-T. Boo to the hoo. Because I am the type to kick a dude when he’s down, I decided to challenge Calvin Shub to a blog-off… I figure that since he already lost (L-O-S-T) recently, he wouldn’t mind losing a rhyme battle so soon after that event. Just so you folks do not feel sympathy toward him, I included a photo at the start of this write-up. That’s him with Solenn Heusaff at a recent event – enough reason to hate him (or hate on him if you’re keen on weird preposition use). He’s clearly mocking me with that photo… I chose to obscure his eyes because his face isn’t really helping the photo much.

Well, here we go, Shub! I hope you’re ready! (FYI, you’re not, because I’m not even going to inform you.)

Please nobody tell him. Shhh… Don’t even visit his Facebook page.

Let the backstabbing commence…


Yo Calvin Shub
You be frontin’ to the club
You sayin’ you be with it
But nobody buy yo’ flub

You sayin’ that you love
Getting ladies in yo’ tub
That you munchin’ on the nubbin’
While they work yo’ footie sub

Yo, but how you wear the glove?
When all you got’s that tiny stub?
That itty bitty schlub
Be lookin’ like a little grub

So, where you at, bub?
You chafin’ like a rub
You sayin’ you be down
But you suckin’ on my chub

You better quit it, mister Shub
It’s gonna be a drub
The ball’s in yo’ court, son
And the score be game to love.

 

What is this? He actually replied? Oh, for the love of…

Categories: [dickery], [violence], [web]

[6] Comments

6 Comments »

  • Gena says:
    July 17, 2012 A.D. at 8:54 AM

    Oh SNAAAPP! Hahahah! Can’t wait to see how Calvin responds to this. :)

    [Reply]
    • Ronan says:
      July 17, 2012 A.D. at 1:25 PM

      with any luck, he won’t. i’m scared of him. thanks, gena… and congrats on the babymaking!

      [Reply]
  • Eize says:
    July 20, 2012 A.D. at 6:08 PM

    Mr. Shub has been chill since this started. :)

    [Reply]
    • Ronan says:
      July 20, 2012 A.D. at 6:15 PM

      shub can’t take the heat from ro-dawg.

      [Reply]
  • Calvin says:
    July 30, 2012 A.D. at 6:35 PM

    i’m a little teapot short and stout
    here’s my handle, imma shove it in your snout

    chiti chiti bang it’s a bubble gum
    masarap ito and ilalagay ko sa hair mo

    *boom*

    [Reply]
    • Ronan says:
      August 3, 2012 A.D. at 10:24 PM

      mr shizzub in the hizzouse!

      [Reply]

 

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