European Idol

I admire and appreciate your capacity for cultural tolerance. Had I known, I wouldn’t have suggested Greenhills as your first stop, not when you look like a younger Kirk Long. I believe, for all of your seventeen years, that it’s your first time to be in the Eastern Hemisphere? I think it is all but certain for you to attract attention in a flea market, if only for being white. Please ignore the vendors when they start calling you ‘Mr. Handsome’ (notice her adam’s apple?), or when they ask you to be ‘their first customer’ (they mean exactly that, as they associate this with good luck, FYI). Those are common, even the aggressive mobile phone sellers who get in your faces. However, the other vendor who repeatedly brushed your back with a loose handful of peso bills while you weren’t looking – that’s not so common. It’s downright bizarre, especially when she kept saying ‘good luck’. I hope you didn’t feel violated. I suppose that, after the Chinese New Year, together the Santo Niño and Quiapo fiestas, Filipinos would need to find an outlet for their unquenchable urge to rub physical objects for luck. You probably look lucky, perhaps in the same way that the Alaska Boy can remind them of the Santo Niño. I apologize, anyway. I guess you should still be thankful that you didn’t remind her of an indigenous fertility idol.

Categories: [culture], [metro], [pellets]

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